I met a few friends for tea yesterday. I was coming from a meeting and was about an hour early so I decided to sit and chill for a bit. Of course, it was inevitable that I began people watchin.
The alfresco cafe was filled with mostly couples and I began watching them. Interestingly, except for a SINGLE couple, the rest hardly established any amount of eye-contact to make me think that their relationship was going any further. They were cold, and it was almost clear that they would rather be somewhere else. And the texting, well, what can I say?
The fact of the matter is everyone enjoys looking at something they find appealing and if very little to no eye contact is present, then it's very difficult to find a connection. Any kind of connection is good to begin with.
Of course, I am assuming their history but it was too overwhelming and quite clear that many couple do not establishe enough eye contact during conversation. It could be a Singapore thing - you know the conservative Singaporean - but again, I think not. At least not with the younger generation who claim to be bolder and more forward.
Even if you are the shy sort, you still really need to have eye contact when he is speaking to you. Unless of course you really despise him which brings up the question of why you are sitting across the table from him in the first place. If you keep looking anywhere else but at him, he will eventually get the message and it's hard to see you going any further.
Relationships are all about building from the bottom up and communication offers a solid foundation.
There was however, one woman who appeared super confident and spent all the time looking and gazing at her partner. It was kind of freaky. Maybe she couldn't get her eyes off him, but I could feel that the guy was getting a little nervous, awkward even. You can overdo it.
Just remember that eye contact is so underrated, yet so vital in creating a link to your partner. Many things good can come out of it.
Missus Singapore out!