RINGS & RUBS (Part 2)

(Continued from yesterday)

My husband, who knows about my DIY indulgences, describes it as ‘keeping the motor in good shape’. But it’s also a mental thing. It keeps the mind primed for sex too.

With the absence of guilt, you really revel in the freedom to visit with your fantasies and desires. Best of all, it’s a harmless way to do so.

For me, masturbation also has a tendency to transcend into the bedroom. It’s like an appetiser for great sex. I guess for the voyeuristic ones, it could serve as a pre-sex show while for the reciprocating ones it could be a mutual undertaking.

I am certainly not proposing for every married person to get down to some serious DIY, but you ought to talk about it with your significant other. If you can communicate your needs and desires with to one another, masturbation shouldn't be a problem in a marriage.

That said, masturbation shouldn’t be replacing sex with your spouse. Now that could certainly have a negative impact on a marriage. And if you’re spending more money weekly on batteries for your sex toys than you do on groceries, have a need to do it in public places or even find yourself conversing with a toy by its given name, I do believe you may need to some serious counseling.

Missus Singapore out!

RINGS & RUBS (Part 1)

Pleasing’ oneself is excusable when you’re single but it’s often scoffed at when you’re married. However, masturbation does not necessarily mean one is not enjoying a fulfilling sex life.

For the longest time, both phenomena have been rarely mentioned in the same breadth. It seems there’s an unwritten marital rule that when someone in a marriage masturbates, it is a clear sign that one is either not enjoying or getting enough of ‘it’.

Personally, I see no reason why both cannot co-exist. After all, masturbation is really a normal and natural activity that most people engage in. Moreover, it is really a useful tool to explore where and how you love to be touched.

Of course it’s not critical for sexual pleasure but if you’ve been doing it since the dawn of your sexual discovery, there is no reason why it has to end after you get hitched. I certainly didn’t.

For many women, masturbation is very much a hidden habit in their marriage, often creating feelings of guilt and shame.

A straw poll of 32 married women indicated that out of the 15 women who admitted they masturbated, 10 did so secretly. And of those ten, seven harboured some level of guilt and shame. The five who did so with their spouse’s knowledge had no such feelings.

A friend of mine related how her husband of two years was shocked to catch her pleasing herself in the shower one afternoon.

It was as if he caught me in bed with another man!” she exclaimed.

Not surprisingly, he became withdrawn for several days, recoiling from the dent his ego had taken. Like many men, he felt that only he should hold the key to his wife’s orgasms.

So it certainly helps to talk about it way before getting ‘caught’. I have always believed that what causes the most problems in a marriage are hidden fears, desires, and temptations.

(To be continued)

Missus Singapore out!

WHO'S BEEN NAUGHTY?

This is definitely the kind of punishment any guy would volunteer for. Thanks Jannine.

Missus Singapore out!

BAD TIMES

Am working odd jobs now. This is the neon sign on the roof of my car...

And I placed this along the street I live. Times are bad guys.....

Missus Singapore out!